BQT, stop, take a deep breath. As usual, your H is messing with you and you are taking it even further. You know nothing, and even anything you did know... you can't change. All you can change is how you react to all this. I know I sound like a broken record, but you have to detach. Immediately end any conversations that go down this path. If he starts being rude to you, calmly say that you aren't interested in being spoken to that way and will speak with him when he is being civil. Don't try to find out anything about OW - treat her as irrelevant. Treat yourself the way you'd treat a beloved friend in these circumstances... take yourself somewhere nice, forgive yourself for any mistakes and try to make yourself happy. Your moods are too dependent on the externals of your sitch. Be happy within yourself and pity your idiot H and his idiot OW and all the drama they are inflicting upon themselves.
