BQT1 - these certainly seem like people who deserve each other. One of the things i have been struggling with in the dark is do i want to be with my W because i love her, i want to make her happy, because i know she is the one for me OR because i am enamoured with the though of the "Leave it to Beaver" family - in short why do i want to be there. I still come back to the first one for me. but no one should have to be treated the way you are, peoples feelings are not a joke or a game. I would encourage you to make a decision and stick to it - this is either the man you see yourself with watching the sun go down on the SoCal shore in 50 years or it is not - you will always be attached to him in some way shape or form since you have had children. Not to cast aspersions on your H, but it does not seem like he is the type to play an active role in his childs life - and with the way he acts that is not a bad thing - sorry to psudo vent on your thread - stay strong and remember you are a better / stronger person than when this started - he is the one walking out on the fairy tale - you are the one letting go of the horror flick!
