The campground I went to on Saturday was booked. I went for a nice sunset paddle on the lake, and then headed home. My plan was to drop off the boat and go out for a beer, but W was home when I got there. She was cooking the first zucchini of the season, ones that I had been watching, waiting for them to get big enough to pick. She offered to share, which was more than I expected. I was aloof, but greeted her warmly. She asked if I had fun, I told her that I did, and that I was going to camp if space was available. She acted a little funny about it.
After eating, I asked W if she had talked to our pregnant friend. She said that she had (first time in many months) She became a little more vitriolic, and said that Friend had asked where W was living, that she had heard W moved out. At that point she said "It's my house, I am not moving out" I said "Good, I don't want you to." I told her that the only thing I said to anyone up the grapevine from friend was that W was staying at SILs often. W said "This is my house; If it weren't for me you wouldn't have anything" I said, "it is our house, we have both worked very hard to build and pay for it" She said " I want the deed" I said, "why do you want the deed?" She said, "well, I want it out of the fire safe so I can look at it."
That scared me a bit. Is she going to try to work me off of the deed somehow? I honestly don't know where she is coming from sometimes.
I took off my ring the other day to put lotion on my hands, and I never put the ring back on. I forgot at first, and then when I realized that it was off, I never bothered to put it back on. Every time I felt it on my finger, I thought of W, what she has done, and the fact that she is not wearing hers. Saturday night, after dinner, I was working on the computer and she came upstairs I turned around to see what was up, and she said "So, you took your ring off..." I said yeah, I took it off to put on lotion, and forgot to put it back on. “She made a funny face, and turned away for a bit, and then said “Did you go out or something?" I said, "Only to (racquetball friend's)" She sat back down on the futon, and chatted for a while, telling me about her work schedule, that she has been taking yoga 4 times a week, that the yoga guy gives them massages on occasion, and that she and SIL got a bunch of looks when they went into the grocery in their yoga duds. I simply mumbled, "OH".
She was gone all day Sunday. She came home around 9. I was in the process of making dinner for the two of us. After dinner, said “you didn't take off your ring because of lotion, you took it off because you went out to the bars." She had a smirk on her face when she spoke. I said, “I haven't been to the bars in quite some time, and I am not looking for another woman, I am married to you." She then basically repeated herself, as if she didn't believe that I didn't go out looking... I told her that I was honoring my vows. She made a comment I don't recollect, and I said that she had dumped her vows in the trash. She said she was sorry, that she never meant to hurt me. I said, but I was hurt. I then went upstairs to list stuff. She followed me up, and made some more apologetic statements. I was occupied at first with my task. She made a statement that made me turn around. It was a half finished statement, so I turned to see what she was trying to say. She stumbled on her words a great deal. She asked if I was trying to win her back. I asked if it seemed like I was trying to win her back. She said no. I said that there was no "winning", and that I didn't have any ability to change her mind. I said that I was honoring our vows and living a decent life, and that I had no control over what she chose to do. I said if she chose to get a D, then that would be her choice. She said she hadn't changed her mind. I said I hadn't either, and in fact, I bet that neither of us has tried to change our minds. She said nothing.
She is acting jealous that I took of my ring, when hers was in her car for two weeks, since before Easter. It has been in her closet (I think) since Easter. Is she afraid I might do what she ahs done? I told her point blank that I am honoring my vows, but she doesn't seem to believe.
This is the best brief synopsis that I can offer for the recent interactions. My recollection skills seem to run headlong into my deflection skills. When she kicks in with the Vitriol, I tend to lose track of what she is saying. Sometimes it seems like she is looking for ways to hurt me. I wonder what she would have said if I told her that I was trying to win her back...Fat Chance, or something similar maybe....
Today at work, I was trying to figure out the nature of an object in my hands, both the material and the function. As per my normal process of research, I tapped my ring finger on the object to see if it was metal or something else. Funny thing is, my ring was gone, so I couldn't tell. I don't like having my ring off, but I don't feel right wearing it anymore. She has destroyed the meaning, and she is trying to blame me for it.
After eating, I asked W if she had talked to our pregnant friend. She said that she had (first time in many months) She became a little more vitrolic, and said that Friend had asked where W was living, that she had heard W moved out. At that point she said "It's my house, I am not moving out" I said "Good, I don't want you to." I told her that the only thing I said to anyone up the grapevine from frined was that W was staying at SILs often. W said "This is my house, If it weren't for me you wouldn't have anything" I said, "it is our house, we have both worked very hard to build and pay for it" She said " I want the deed" I said, "why do you want the deed?" She said, "well, I want it out of the fire safe so I can look at it."
That scared me a bit. Is she going to try to work me off of the deed somehow? I honestly don't know where she is coming from sometimes.
I took off my ring the other day to put lotion on my hands, and I never put the ring back on. I forgot at first, and then when I realized that it was off, I never bothered to put it back on. Every time I felt it on my finger, I thought of W, what she has done, and the fact that she is not wearing hers. Saturday night, after dinner, I was working on the computer and she came upstairs I turned around to see what was up, and she said "So, you took your ring off..." I said yeah, I took it off to put on lotion, and forgot to put it back on. " She made a funny face, and turned away for a bit, and then said " Did you go out or something?" I said, "Only to (raquetball friend's)" She sat back down on the futon, and chatted for a while, telling me about her work schedule, that she has been taking yoga 4 times a week, that the yoga guy gives them massages on ocaision, and that she and SIL got a bunch of looks when they went into the grocery in their yoga duds. I simply mumbled, "OH".
She was gone all day Sunday. She came home around 9. I was in the process of making dinner for the two of us. After dinner, said " you didn't take off your ring because of lotion, You took it off because you went out to the bars." She had a smirk on her face when she spoke. I said, " I haven't been to the bars in quite some time, and I am not looking for another woman, I am married to you." She then basically repeated herself, as if she didn't believe that I didn't go out looking... I told her that I was honoring my vows. She made a comment I don't recollect, and I said that she had dumped her vows in the trash. She said she was sorry , that she never meant to hurt me. I said, but I was hurt. I then went upstairs to list stuff. She followed me up, and made some more apologetic statements. I was occupied at first with my task. She made a statement that made me turn around. It was a half finished statement, so I turned to see what she wass trying to say. She stumbled on her words a great deal. She asked if I was trying to win her back. I asked if it seemed like I was trying to win her back. She said no. I said that there was no "winning", and that I didn't have any ability to change her mind. I said that I was honoring our vows and living a decent life, and that I had no control over what she chose to do. I said if she chose to get a D, then that would be her choice. She said she hadn't changed her mind. I said I hadn't either, and in fact, I bet that neither of us has tried to change our minds. She said nothing.
SHe is acting jealous that I took of my ring, when hers was in her car for two weeks, since before easter. It has been in her closet (I think) since Easter. Is she afraid I might do what she ahs done? I told her point blank that I am honoring my vows, but she doesn't seem to believe.
This is the best brief synopsis that I can offer for the recent interactions. My recollection skills seem to run headlong into my deflection skills. When she kicks in with the Vitrol, I tend to lose track of what she is saying. Sometimes it seems like she is looking for ways to hurt me. I wonder what she would have said if I told her that I was trying to win her back...Fat Chance, or something similar maybe....
Today at work, I was trying to figure out the nature of an object in my hands, both the material and the function. As per my normal process of research, I tapped my ring finger on the object to see if it was metal or something else. Funny thing is, my ring was gone, so I couldn't tell. I don't like having my ring off, but I don't feel right wearing it anymore. She has destroyed the meaning, and she is trying to blame me for it.
