I wish I knew what to say to turn things around for you. I just know that with your book writing and other skills, you will have a bright future.
OW2 (proves he is nuts), temper tantrums, unrealistic thinking and poor judgement on Andy's part makes it impossible to get along with him. I used to feel guilty about my arguements with my W, but she was on drugs, it would be impossible to get along with any drug addict.
People like your XH and my XW are pros at sucking us into arguments with them. I pray that for the kids sake I can limit the number of disagreements with her.
Jo, keeping writing and dreaming of a brighter future.