I've been hanging around in the "shadows" for about a month now, reading the posts mostly on the SSM forum, and I don't want to hijack your thread, ZB. I promise to start my own thread soon and tell you all my story.
I just have a few comments to share right now. This is one of the most intimate and caring threads I have come accross since discovering this Forum. You folks are great the way you share with each other. I have read SSM and asked my W to read it also. I'm HDH; she's LDW. She read 3 chapters of SSM and put it down. I recently picked up PM in both forms, book and audio CD because you folks reccomended it over and over. I've been through the audio CD twice so far.
I just want to say that SSM, PM, and this forum have dissolved alot of my anger and resentment that have been building over the 27 years of our marriage.
Wishing to make a contribution to ZB's thread, I'm thinking, somewhat like Schnarch, if only we could be this revealing to our partners in our own relationships? It seems to me that it is easy and soothing to reach out to our global support community, when really what would make us truly happy is to have that break through conversation with our spouses after reaching "criticle mass".
How can we motivate ourselves to overcome our anxiety and confront our significant others?
Please don't think I'm trivializing anyone's sitch. We DO want, for the most part, to hang onto our relationships, not to lose them, so this is difficult.
Oh, and I have never had that BJ either, ZB. Yes, I want it and have never stopped wishing my W wanted to do it for me. For me, the BJ would truely say "Webermiester, I love you."
