It's been more than a month now, and I've had more than a couple break downs, and been ready to thrown in the D towel.
When the main reason I'm living and working on a farm is for my family to enjoy the wholesome lifestyle, and to not have my family with me, makes me wonder what I'm doing.
W and kids had a great visit here at the farm, W left saying she could live here! I was totally encouraged.
But that weekend, I drove down to spend with W and kids, and Saturday night things got so bad I actually packed and was getting ready to get in my car and leave a night early when the kids came out and convinced me to stay. W did say she was glad I didn't leave, but we had a subdued evening. We enjoyed church Sunday as a family and spent the rest of the day at an outdoor pool.
It was earlier this week that I actually suggested we D. I wish I could say it was part of an LRT - but it wasn't. Fortunate, W hung up on me and later left me a nice message.
W and I had a good talk tonight. I still haven't found a good way to discuss things that we disagree about - seems like I bring it up, W gets mad, I get madder, we fight and/or take a time-out, then the situation figures its self out or one of us realizes we don't need to worry about it and we never discuss the problem again. Not a good way to problem solve, but if that's how God is going to keep us together, I'll take it for right now.
I'm going down tomorrow night to spend weekend with W and Kids. I need to set some personal goals for the weekend. Maybe I'll have time tomorrow in my 2 1/2 hour drive to see them.
