I have decided to return to the family farm. W is mostly upset, but has brief moments of clarity where she says this will be a good thing for us. During these brief moments she accepts that this will be a major lifestyle change, but that we can work together to make things better in the long run. Mostly she is angry and blaming, saying I am ruining her life, I have ruined her life, she is going to divorce me and take the kids and make it on her own, etc. etc. etc.
It has been an extreme test of patience and not listening to anything I hear to keep from responding to her barbs and hateful comments. She has gone off on my mother (over the phone) at least twice. She went off on my mom this morning while the kids and I were at the library, then she called my mom back and had a good conversation.
I walked in the door with flowers while W was wrapping up second phone conv with my mom. W was positive, happy, up-beat, commented that "I had flowers and that was a good thing." Less than two hours later, W is cursing me with "F*&%" you, and "F*&%" your flowers, I'm going to make your life a living hell like you've made mine. She doesn't care whether the kids hear her or not.
The kids have gotten used to escaping to the neighbors house, going outside or locking themselves in their room when W starts going off. I think that is a deciding factor in me moving back to my family roots - if W is going to go off instead of discuss things with me, I need to be someplace with a support structure and safety for my kids.
