I heard a radio program were a woman that has a Phd. Felt she was often criticized by her H or her H had a better way to do things most of the time. The host determined the woman brought her doubt into the marriage from he family of origin and her H confidence attracted her to him prior to marriage. Now her lack of confidence and his confident is a problem in the Marriage.
The radio host speculated the woman was reluctant to make decisions based on the woman’s statements she did not like being wrong or did not like to make mistakes. The radio host gave the caller an assignment, to make decisions based on the facts available and not investigate everything to death. The caller was to make 6 mistakes over the next several days and report back to the host. The host suggested the caller would not die if she made a mistake.
HD could it be you fear making a mistake so much that you are all up tight and it shows to your W? I know for myself, being frustrated and wanting to do something that works and has a good outcome, causes me to not do anything at times. This leads to more frustrations, forgetting to do things, spending too much time looking for answers, spending too much time determining which course of action will cause the least stress and work the best. Also if I do the wrong thing, then I am the AH. I want to be a good guy.
The above traits (gathering information, wanting to make the right decision, not wanting to hurt other people, wanting to be a good guy/gal are all normally desired traits. It’s the no decision or postponing the decision is where the problem lies.
Just a thought. The radio program seem to fit your and my situation when I was listening to it. People have to be willing to fail sometimes.
