Hairy, I think it sounds like she's doing a lot better, as far as the affection is concerned! I would be happy with that little bit of progress and hopeful that she keeps adding to it.
Well, that's too bad about the permission angle. To me, that sort of dynamic creates a VERY stale and regimented sexual atmosphere. There will never be any spontaneity or arousal-then-desire if there always has to be permission. Cause her knee-jerk reaction is "no". The thought of asking to touch is really abhorrent to me, I'm not quite sure I can pin down why, tho.
Gotta go; D3 has my new bracelet around her neck and, in addition to the obvious safety hazards associated with that, it is a NEW bracelet, okay. LOL