Don't worry about saying what you need to on here...we're all adults and can handle it. We're also aware that whatever you say on here is YOUR POV, your H has his POV too....so we are aware you are working on an issue between you two and we won't assume he's some terrible person.
Ok...IMPOV BDSM (while not for me) is something that if (2) partners are ok with...then it's fine. However, you obviously aren't ok with it. Has he always had a fetish for BDSM? Or is this something that you've noticed him lean towards throughout your M?
The prostitutes are a BIG problem...that is cheating, period! I'm glad to hear that you two have a C session already set up....I truly believe that is going to be necessary for the two of you to work through this. Sexually speaking you two seem to be lightyears apart in style preferences. Not to get too nosy here, but what would be your preference.....more "vanilla" type sex (as he might call it, or are you at all willing to spice things up?
I wonder why he feels he needs to "dominate" any woman. Or...is he the recipient of the domination? I understand that for many participants in BDSM there's trust at play...you must trust your partner really won't physically hurt you (at least not badly)....so there's some mind control at play too.
FWIW...you've come to a good place to get some objective feedback, suggestions, and understanding.
