This afternoon, we were going out to look for a new toaster oven, when I mentioned to her that I waould like her to give more consideration to everything I'd been talking about.
She said, "What do you think I've been doing? I've been trying to see somebody about my sleep, I've been reading, but I can't read any faster! My body is just not cooperating! I'm having hot flashes, I'm having headaches, I can't sleep, my foot hurts..." She then accused me of being like her father was to her mother: buying things for her just to try and get her to sleep with me. (I'm not. Really. Nor am I withholding vital things from her in order to get her to sleep with me, the way her second ex-husband did.)
Then I asked her, "Just tell me one thing. Do you want to resolve this issue? Because we can resolve your medical issues, but if you don't want to sleep with me, then that's something else again."
"I don't want to sleep with anyone," she said. (I presume she means "at this point.") Then she said, "Turn around, let's go home. This is feeling too much like my dad and mom."
I turned around. We went home in silence, and she stormed out of the car, slamming the door. I sat outside in the car for some time afterwards, trying to figure out what I did wrong. When I came in, the bedroom door was shut.
I'm thinking, now I've really blown it. She seems upset at me. But is it really bad, or is this something she'll have to go through in order for us to come out of this? Greeneyedlass, I hope you're out there, because I could really use your words of wisdom now.
- "A"
"Everything that happens, happens. Everything that, in happening, causes something else to happen, causes something else to happen. Everything that, in happening, causes itself to happen again, happens again."
