Maybe I'm off-base, but I feel like there is an essential similarity between your sich, my sich and the sich of Julie. With your sich being the worst and Julie's being the best at the moment. The thing I can't figure out is what exactly is making the difference. Is Julie more differentiated than you or I or is her H simply less of a jerk than yours or mine?
I've had many a day when I've felt just about the way you're feeling now. Recently I had a thought that was either very perverse or very differentiated or some combination of the two. I was thinking I ought to tell my H that if he wants to have sex with some other women that would be alright with me and I wouldn't even "retaliate" by stepping out myself because I am sick of feeling like I am in competition with some sort of fantasy woman. Sort of the ultimate "If you love something, set it free..." mindset. Actually, I did say something kind of along those lines when we were fighting recently and maybe that's the reason why I've gotten laid 4x this week. What I said was "Please feel free to leave me and go find a woman who doesn't want to have sex with you to lust after if that is what you want.".
"Tell me, what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?" - Mary Oliver
