Quote: This will be the hardest thing to do. But I will try my hardest. I am the kind of person who can't stand when someone does something and thinks they never have to say sorry or take accountability for their actions.
No way??!! LOL!!
Sorry, hon, I'm just kidding around! But I could sense that from your posts on my thread when you vent about my H !
Seriously though, yes, everyone needs to be accountable for their actions. Your H does and so do you. You can't control him, but you CAN control YOU. You need to work on changing your behavior and attitude towards H. You know this.
Think of a time when things went wrong between you and H. What was said? What was done? What happened to make things go bad? How did you contribute to it? I'm sure you'll find something and think, "Maybe I shouldn't have done/said that." When you figure out what it is that you're doing wrong, that's what you need to stop. That's what you need to change.
It's hard work and it takes time, but the more positive and loving you are to H, the more likely he will open up to you.
Quote: What do you think are the real problems? Do you think the problems led to the infrequency..is that what you are saying?
Well, I'm no expert, but yes, I believe that's it.
You know my sitch so I don't want to go into great detail here, but I think the biggest issues for us were my H's expectations, the resentment that built up inside of him when those expectations weren't met, and of course, the depression and enormous amount of guilt he has for what he's done. So....it's going to be awhile before our life is back to where it used to be a year and a half ago. When it does happen, it's still great, but it doesn't happen as often as I'd like. Plus you have to factor in H's traveling for work all the time , but it looks like that won't be going on much longer.
Be strong, cally. You can make it through this.
JV
"I can't change the direction of the wind, but I can adjust my sails to always reach my destination."
Valerie
"I can't change the direction of the wind, but I can adjust my sails to always reach my destination." ~ author unknown
But I will try my hardest. I am the kind of person who can't stand when someone does something and thinks they never have to say sorry or take accountability for their actions.
No way??!! 
LOL!! 
life is back to where it used to be a year and a half ago. When it does happen, it's still great, but it doesn't happen as often as I'd like. Plus you have to factor in H's traveling for work all the time 
, but it looks like that won't be going on much longer.
