I understand that line of thinking. Sometimes there is a part of me that wants to opt out by leaving and there is another part that wants to stay for the good stuff, buy a toy chest worth of sex toys and stop asking H or working on it in any way. The problem is that the lack of emotions or human contact doesn't do it for me. The sex toy avenue would just cause me to be endlessly horny. One episode of quality sex with H and I'm fine for a few days - an orgasm or two from mb and I'm horny again in an hour. (OK - someone will make a comment about Chinese food here - go ahead).
My question to you JJ - Why do you stay. Love for your H? Love for your kids? Boundless hope and optimism? Are there good things about your life that we don't know about that are just too good to walk away from? We all stay for our own reasons. That is why the escape fantasy is mostly that - a fantasy.
If it is getting to be more than a fantasy you need to decide what the parameters are - when will you know you are done? I value my marrriage and I won't let it go without a hard fight but I also left a marriage and believe me it was the right thing to do (he is still wallowing in the exact same place I left him and in the same old excuses). I'm just thinking that you need to define things for yourself - I finally had to in my prior marriage and it was good that I did.
