Sorry if I offended you with my question on your XH being S8's father. My meaning in asking that question was whether you were M before and S8 was your XH's stepson. I am not fully familiar with your history with XH because your current thread does not have that info. My apologies to you.
Now, it is still puzzling to me why he would not want to see S8 more often. Your reasons: 1. He is acting like a sore loser on teh custody issue. 2. He does not want to see S8 because he does not want to see you. Both of these seem like they dont make any sense. It may just be typical MLC checking-out behavior. I read your post on Jo's question regarding reasons for D and his reasons seem consistent with MLC. You know, it seems like money (or lack thereof) was a big issue in your D. In that regard, your finding a job and getting financially settled may be the most positive thing that you can do for your R. Since, even where you are, XH seems disinclined to visit S8, why not take a well-paying job where it becomes available and let XH worry about moving so he can see S8 more? Just questioning....I don't know.
Regarding the anniversary issue, mentioning all the good things in your M is nto a good idea. Michele mentions that explicitly in DR as being not a good idea. Just my 0.02.
UD
The 3 laws of DBing:
1. PMA is critical to DBing.
2. Since drop in WAW's PMA leads to drop in LBS's PMA and vice-versa detachment is critical.
3. Validate to raise WAW's PMA and GAL to raise LBS's.
