Ok, this stupid computer of mine likes to shut down whenever and lost my post here this time!
Thanks for your thoughts. I am too much of a worrier and that goes back to one of your previous posts, ud, where you said we don't want to rub the WAS wrong. That was on my mind last nite, ex had told me a couple of times not to call him, but it was probably out of anger, it's not like I am calling him for just anything.
And yes, he probably wanted to get off the phone in a hurry because he was uncomfortable. Didn't want to say something that would limit our contact again. It was really nice to hear his voice and I could have talked all night w/him! (From now on I need to be the one cutting the convo short!)
Ex did slip up and say that he had thought the bday was next month, now all those phone calls he made thurs seem more like him pursuing me.
But on to the rest of my life. I have a ridiculously high PMA today, I am on pins and needles waiting for some job postings to call me back. Keep telling myself to relax, be patient; I just feel like something fantastic is coming into my life soon. Well, maybe I will just enjoy this feeling for a while longer!
Sorry, I don't know anything about your deal but I saw the title of your thread today and I just wanted to say Congratulations!! Anyone with "Abnormally high PMA" deserves a shout out...
I am still feeling so comfortable about life today. Last night I kept wondering what it is that has me feeling this good, since I don't want to lose it, but can't put my finger on it!
I also want to share this w/ex. Don't exactly know how yet, but last night I just wanted to call him and say thank you for the divorce! (but that could be rude in the light that I do want a new R w/him!) so I didn't! Somehow I have to impart this new me into our next conversation!
On w/life today and I for one am going to enjoy whatever comes up. Still haven't heard back on any of my job applications, but will continue putting in more and see what comes up.
And my d24 called and had to miss work today (pinkeye!) so she is coming to visit this afternoon.
Take care everyone, I sure wish I could figure out the secret to being happy w/life; I would share that w/everyone here! T
That's great! Distill some of that high PMA and send some to me in a care package.
Quote: I also want to share this w/ex. Don't exactly know how yet, but last night I just wanted to call him and say thank you for the divorce! (but that could be rude in the light that I do want a new R w/him!) so I didn't! Somehow I have to impart this new me into our next conversation!
Why don't you share it with your ex? Call him up and say hi, just wanted to see how you are doing. I don't know how to do that either. Come on T....pursue...run to the light. Abandon the dark side. You see how bad things went for Anakin Skywalker when he went to the dark side...he got his arm and both legs chopped off and caught on fire. He he he he
In the end, it's not the years in your life that count. It's the life in your years. Abraham Lincoln
It is hard to fail, but it is worse never to have tried to succeed. Theodore Roosevelt
I think this is why I am having so much PMA. I have finally started to let go of ex and whatever his problem is, and am just enjoying the little miracles in life.
And I am making a lot of my own decisions lately and I feel really good about that.
I am just going to ramble here for a minute, since s8 is still a little bit wound up from seeing his sister. Well, maybe I am too!
Sorry Wes, but I’m going to wait to talk to ex. I refuse to go to the dark side but will only illuminate the light. I’m sure he will see it eventually!
Actually, I did impart a few words to d24 that may get around to him. Such as the job hunt and possibly moving wherever that takes me. and the idea that I would really like to go out for my bday, and could invite ex up here to stay w/s8. that wasn’t the reason why I told her those things, but it could just work that way. And she mentioned that her sis and him are very upset w/me for not answering the phone. I said well, dear, they will have to understand that I really do have a life!
I have decided to start having fun in life by enjoying all the things that I have missed out on for so long. I can watch whatever I want on tv, w/o someone else channel surfing or getting upset. (Nobody to interrupt my games during football season! YooHoo! ) I can make a mess of the kitchen and wait all day to clean it up. I can go wherever I want. I can run around the house nude all day if I want. (oops, getting carried away; forgot about the boys being here, and ex didn’t care if I did that! )
I haven’t really thought about his life too much today. I will wait until this weekend when he calls me, and then let him see my light shining. But that’s only if he happens to catch me home!
Take care everyone. I’ll still be around to try and instill this high pma on all of you. T
You are doing great! Keep up a good PMA. Hopefully the work situation will be panning out soon and then you will have an easy time maintaining it. It is hard when there is a lot of free time to fill. One's thoughts tend to stray when that happens.
I like your line :"I have finally started to let go of ex and whatever his problem is, and am just enjoying the little miracles in life." Things start clicking into place when one accepts that as the way it is.
UD
The 3 laws of DBing:
1. PMA is critical to DBing.
2. Since drop in WAW's PMA leads to drop in LBS's PMA and vice-versa detachment is critical.
3. Validate to raise WAW's PMA and GAL to raise LBS's.
YOOHOO! Beginning to get some replies back on the job front. This is going to require some major decision making in the future. Oh, never mind, I've already made some of the decisions.
I've been contacted by recruiters in Georgia and Alabama now, but I am staying in the midwest. I am looking at one in Minneapolis, but if it turns out to be something great; I'm not going to worry about being farther from ex. Ok, maybe I worry a little.
It would be good to be a little closer than 8 hours away; more chances for positive interaction. But I'm beginning to really get comfortable w/having space between us.
I went through and found the post about the MLC stages. Ex sure does fit into the description! And it clarified something for me; I don't want to be around the anger, depression and withdrawal. He just gets spiteful and loads all that on me. So I have made up my mind to sit back and wait.
I'm not giving up hope yet. I still see him coming back around to try and figure out what's got into me. And I will just show him this great PMA that I have! No pursuing or pressure, he can do that.
Another thing I have realized is just how much my s8 is hurting over dad neglecting him. That is where I am focusing my attention. And that will be something that ex will have to make amends on. Whether we have a R later on or not.
I seem to be so busy the past few days, I wonder where did I ever find the time to dwell on him? We are off to get our dog in for a vet check and then run more errands today. I still need to study up some on my interviewing skills. A couple of those jobs are still looking pretty darn good, I just can't wait to start working at one of them now! Have to get past the interviewing first!
I agree, you have to do the things for yourself first without a whole lot of regard for the ex. It will definitely give him pause I think. I hope that he'll find a way to be in your son's life a little more. Know what? I think you are where we all should strive to be. Happy with what life is without regard to our spouse. Thanks for continuing to provide some inspiration.
In the end, it's not the years in your life that count. It's the life in your years. Abraham Lincoln
It is hard to fail, but it is worse never to have tried to succeed. Theodore Roosevelt
You are doing great! I am so there with you with regard to your S8. That is so painful for a kid. My D3 is confused as well but then she is still a little too young to know any better.
Good luck with your job search and it is wonderful how well you are handling your life right now.
UD
The 3 laws of DBing:
1. PMA is critical to DBing.
2. Since drop in WAW's PMA leads to drop in LBS's PMA and vice-versa detachment is critical.
3. Validate to raise WAW's PMA and GAL to raise LBS's.
