How to GAL when SP is jealous/trust is broken??

[heatherg]

You repeat back to your SP what you heard them say

I definitely need to work more on this. You'd think it would be easy enough, but it's really not is it?!

Did you both agree to this or was it left hanging? If you agreed, then you have a problem. If you left it hanging, then you have a problem.

We sort of did leave it hanging, although I indicated that I actually like my schedule the way it is. I told him maybe I could cut back to one night during the week and then go for two hours on Sunday instead of one. The reaction I got told me that wasn't good enough. I like going twice during the week. If something else comes up though, I almost always give the other event priority over karate, so it's not like I live and die by the idea that I have to go twice a week.
I don't know Jabez, right now, I'm not feeling very willing to compromise. I was, but then more stupid events have taken place and he's not leaving his thumb drive out in the open anymore (i.e. he's hiding it). I will NOT go back to a relationship where the only person's feelings that matter is H's. I'm going to stand by my own opinions and thoughts this time; I have nothing to lose. H already disregards me and disrespects me and often downright ignores me, so what's next? Is he going to stop looking at me?? I'm not afraid of driving him away. Quite frankly, if he wants to leave, have at er, that's what I say. I don't want a D, but I don't want THIS R either. Does that make sense?

I would tell him upfront that you would like to talk to SIL to see if there is anyway to do both.

Yes, ideally I would have thought to suggest it while we were speaking on the phone. That's why I'm supposed to count to five before I respond to H. But I have yet to actually count. One of those goals that doesn't come easy to me, I usually totally forget. I'll try harder to remember to count so that I have a moment to actually think about what's been said instead of responding/reacting off the cuff.