I see what you mean Heatherg. Looks like to me that he knows how to manipulate conversations and events so as to keep control. Not good.
I mean, stuff like making you feel guilty by pointing out that whatever you're doing is "putting yourself before the children" when he, by virtue of being disagreeable with you, doesn't care to see himself in that same light, that he's putting his interests above that of the children.
Not that I think you're putting your interests above your children's. Children don't benefit from living with or having as role models two unhappy people who stay married in an unhealthy relationship. better for them to see how two healthy self-loving people go about dealing with the bad times and/or dissolution of their relationship respectfully and kindly.
And the way he'll sigh and roll his eyes, and ask the kids if they want to have fun with him or go with mommy (when it's obvious by how he's phrasing it which way theyll choose) and when they choose against him, how he'll try to ruin the event.
Reminds me of this joke:
"Knock, knock."
"Who's there?"
"Control Freak. Now you say 'Control Freak' who?"
