Quote: For instance, what if I didn't kiss OM? What if I just really wanted to, but never did?
Wanting to ______________is normal some times. It is the act of carrying out our wishes that get us into trouble. I think some peoples idea of "If I was pure, I would not want to ___________." is not realistic. OTH obsessing all the time on the same __________ does get people in trouble. So, a little _______ is normal and a lot of __________ gets us in trouble. You fill in the blank with somethings you consider is stepping over the line.
Quote: if you knew it was affecting your W so deeply, would you continue to do it?
Yes I would quit. I dont want to really be with a picture but I need an outlet sometimes. But,
W/BB not very interested in sex or much recripical physical contact. I can rub her back and feet till the cows come home. I get a quick kiss and a "thanks" then she procedes to hug the dog some times. I feel like I am on the end of a line of girls braiding the girl's in front of her hair. In my situation (feeling) there are only 2 people in line and the other person does not like to switch places.
Would I quit? Yes if I had something to quit for except more almost nothingness. It's like BB saying "I don't like sex much, I don't like to do much physically intense kissing, I want you to hold me, no touching the eroginous zones. I will take free/no strings attached atention. The Marriage agreement said I should not go outside the M for my sexual fulfillment and BB is not willing to meet my sexual desires more than 10% of the time. The other 90% turns to frustrations and resentments over time. I know she has limits on how much sexual contact she feels is too much. What do people do with the differences in sexual desire?
I never dream of being with them, they are only pictures. I see them as sexual beings who are demonstrating something about their sexuality and they are enjoying it. It is kind of like watching a person who enjoys riding the rollercoaster. I am happy for them because they are having a good time. It also amazes me how much varity is present in the human population. (body types, desires, what is normal, abnormal, and how many false concepts people belive in)
Quote: He has power over me now, but at least he doesn't know how much.
I think you need to seperate what you feel from what you think is power.
I can tell someone how they hurt my feelings or moral standard. That is about them. I still maintain my power unless you think your H will use what you tell him to inflict some revenge. If he does that, you still have power by stating firmly and in a friendly manner what you will not accept in a R.
