I forgot to tell you- thanks for reminding me that I can't control H only me. I need to remind myself of that. To drop the rope.
I realise that I use the "I will D you" as a threat, a warning, an attempt to get H to do what I want him to do i.e. not cheat.
But I do often remind myself that his choices are his, his life is his to live- even though I am in his life and his choices affect me- I can't force him to act a certain way or do or not do a certain thing.
I think this is key for me. I want to control things. I want to control H. I need to learn that I can't and more importantly to stop tryign to do it.
