Tim I am really afraid to post since I have not read your other posts and have no idea what has been done and what has not been. So please take this as a well meaning attempt without much background.
It seems to me that desire operates for different people in different ways. She clearly wanted to make love -- was naked in the bed. She clearly was turned on in the beginning -- was lubricated to begin with. But then something happend and she lost connection. There can be a hundred causes. You did something she does not like and distanced herself; she expected some action that was not there; foreplay was missing... who knows!
But that would be the nugget to work from. It feels like you are in a much better position than the normal LD/HD dillemma. I want it and s/he does not is such a vague starting point that one does not know where to go next. What is it about ML that s/he does not like seems to focus on a joint production without necessarily assigning blame.
