I'm sorry to read about your W's insistence on D. I hoped she'd figure it out a bit sooner that there is a better way.
I'd never validate her feelings or choice to D. This could be used 'against' you in the future both in her head, and with D3. How about a simple "I don't agree with you, but I am letting you go."
IMHO, the WAS' guilt is the very thing they need to wrestle with in order to grow. Let her sit with this, as without it, you may be helping her to stunt her growth.
Focus on the R, UD.
Gabriel
PS - I admire your distance running. Never could see myself running that long, but then again, life sure has a way of bringing change, doesn't it?
