but it's just moments in time, especially at night, just before bed...when my mind does a 180 on me and starts thinking about the past.
That's when you're permitting those thoughts access. That's when to practice thought control. You're not going to have memory loss. Replace those thoughts with the thought that hubby is right there in bed with you or something else just as neat.
I start by identifying the thought as harmful to me. That motivates me to kick it out. I replace it with a positive thought.
I've asked all the questions of him... Add to this that he shared a picture of her with me
Well I got confused then when reading originally: "I find myself asking the usual questions... 'was she prettier'".
Sometimes the fact that he lied to me and cheated on me adds to the idea that he may be lying now.
Do his action nowadays create doubt as to his honesty? If not, then there isn't any reason to wonder if he's lying to you. If he's lying to you, the truth will come out eventually, because now you don't have blinders on like you used to, you no longer are a practitioner of "blind" trust. You're more sensitive to sensing when something's amiss.
This is something I had planned on doing, but budget-wise, we just can't afford it right now.
Check and see if there are mental health clinics in your area that offer professional help at a income based sliding scale rate. If not, see if a local medical teaching university offers a clinic.
I've read many threads with your posts, and I find that you always take an impartial yet fair view of a situation, and I appreciate that
