cally -- I do believe H was talking to his boss at that moment. H was trying to get a hold of him all day. He most likely went outside to have his convo just in case things got heated between them. H and his boss (who is also a long-time acquaintance) are in disagreement about what H should or should not be paid for last week's work.
I don't know. Maybe H did think I was only venting yesterday.... Maybe I was, but ..... I just don't know. I'm worn out and so confused about what I should really do.
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Journaling:
Last night at around 9pm, the phone rings and it's H. I figure he called to tell me how well or how bad his poker night is going, but instead he said, "I've been at (mf)'s house talking to him since I left earlier. I'm going to rent a movie that we can watch together, if you want to, then I'm coming home....Do you want to watch a movie with me?" I said, "I don't know." H said alright, he'd see me in a few.
He got here as I was putting the boys to bed. After they were taken care of, I went to play on the computer. H looked at me and asked if I was going to watch the movie he rented with him, and I said no because I heard from several people that it wasn't very good. H said, "Really? I'm watching something else then." H mentioned that "American Chopper" was going to be a new episode last night so I said I'd watch that when it was time.
In the meantime, H watched recorded programs. H came up beside me a few times to see what I was doing on the computer, and I told him I was playing games which I was. H asked for me to watch TV with him, and I said I would when it was time for "Chopper" to come on which was due to start in less than 30 minutes.
H went into the kitchen to make a snack and asked if I wanted anything. I said no thank you. He came back into the living room, ate his snack, then came up to me again and grabbed my hands to turn me away from the computer and walked me over to the couch. (He was being very playful with this -- we used to do this a looong time ago.) Right before we got to the couch, he yanked me down onto the floor and wouldn't let me go! Like I said, we used to do this kind of stuff in the past -- "playful wrestling" . Then H said to me, "Whatever you decide to do, I'll do it." I didn't say anything then we were "goofing" around! H will usually just hold onto me for as long as he can while I try everything and anything to escape ! I got a few elbows in which always makes H laugh, and he started kissing and licking my face all over which made me laugh! I was telling him to stop that, but he wouldn't so I started licking him all over his face, too, and we were both cracking up !......It was fun! If only there were more times like that again.
It was time for "Chopper" to start so we sat down to watch it. H laid on the couch while I sat in the chair across the room snuggled up with a throw blanket. H got up and turned out the lights then was walking in my direction. I clutched the blanket because I had a feeling he was coming over to "playfully" swipe it from me (happened in the past, too), and that dirty rascal did ! But this time it took him 3 attempts !
H went over to the couch with it, and I went over, too, to get my blankie ( ) back. We "wrestled" over it for a few minutes, and I triumphed ! I won by submission ! I know all of H's ticklish spots .
I sat back over in the chair, and we watched the show. H got up a few times and always asked if I wanted anything while he was up. I said no thank you.
When the show was over, there was another "Chopper" coming on (a rerun), and I guess I was starting to nod off because H said, "Well, if you're falling asleep then I'm just going to go to bed." Then he shut everything off on me -- the TV, the lights, everything -- so I'd have to go to bed, too. Another one of H's old antics .
So we went to bed, and H began pulling on my pj's. I asked him to stop and he said, "Well that means for you to get over here!" So I scooted closer, and we spooned. H said good night, and so did I. He started rubbing my back and side real gently, and he gave me a few kisses here and there on my back. I'm sure he wanted , but maybe he remembered I told him it was that time of month because he didn't ask for it like he usually does.
Anyway, we fell asleep like that. It was nice and very comfortable.
If things could be more like they were last night, I'd be a lot more optimistic, but I feel like it's only a matter of time before "moody H" comes back.
H got up this morning and seemed to be in a decent mood. He took the kids to school and said he would be back in time to pick up S5 when it was time for him to get out. H had to go to Sacramento to pick up some equipment for a service call he has to do.
Trying to hang in there for now. Thanks for listening.
JV
"I can't change the direction of the wind, but I can adjust my sails to always reach my destination."
Valerie
"I can't change the direction of the wind, but I can adjust my sails to always reach my destination." ~ author unknown
. Then H said to me, "Whatever you decide to do, I'll do it." I didn't say anything then we were "goofing" around! H will usually just hold onto me for as long as he can while I try everything and anything to escape 
! I got a few elbows in which always makes H laugh, and he started kissing and licking my face all over which made me laugh! I was telling him to stop that, but he wouldn't so I started licking him all over his face, too, and we were both cracking up 
.
, but maybe he remembered I told him it was that time of month because he didn't ask for it like he usually does.
