LDW and HDH working on it

[doglover]

Thanks for all the comments - I got the roasting I deserved. I haven't been doing a good job of setting priorities and SL has suffered.

(Just to put it in perspective, not that it justifies things - I took off work on Friday so we could leave early for the holiday, but was feeling guilty about not having accomplished enough last week at work and then taking a vacation day Fri. I was hopeful of making a computer program work and then emailing a colleague (actually a superior) who seemed anxious for the results. After I worked on it for an hour I solved one small problem but had to tell him the other was more complicated and I still couldn't make it work right. He wrote back not to worry, it's a long weekend and I should enjoy my weekend with my son. So I was stupidly - and unassertively - feeling stressed and guilty about my work to the detriment of my H and our R.)

But in general, I think a schedule would help us, especially given that various health related needs make various times better or worse for each of us. H flags in the evening, and is now semi-retired so he is sometimes up for an interlude in the a.m. when I am rushing around getting ready to go to work. H is usually very considerate of the fact that I take longer to reach O - which makes weekday a.m. harder. But perhaps we should plan on a "quicky" during the week (I think "Mars and Venus in the Bedroom" which I haven't read but skimmed in a bookstore, recommends quickies from time to time).

H is very resistant to a schedule - he thinks it sounds forced and would put him under pressure. But I am realizing I could schedule myself to be available weekend mornings without H realizing it. (I have a medication I take one morning a week which requires I take it first thing in the A.M. and not eat or go back to bed for at least 1/2 hour - since I look forward to that first cup of coffee in the a.m. I have jumped out of bed on sat or sun a.m. to take the pill and then get coffee before the caffiene withdrawal headache sets in - well it's not really that bad, but I do love/need that first cup. Anyway, I've realized I can take that pill on any weekday instead and leave the weekend a.m.s more relaxed.

I got 2 books in from Amazon this week - they couldn't be more different.

"Five Minutes to Orgasm Every Time You Make Love: Female Orgasm Made Simple" a slim paperback with a more lighthearted but almost mechanistic approach. Polished that one off fast. 3 basic steps but I only remember 2 right now: self stimulation and fantasy during IC.

"Passionate Marriage" is dense but fascinating. Hard to find the time to read it so it will take a while. Understanding how differentiation applies to us will take some time. It's good to read success stories though.

gotta scoot, thanks for the reality checks,
Doglover