At the beginning

[keepmypower]

Coach -

Sounds like we're two kindered spirits, and in very similar situations.

Now I've only begun the DB stuff in the past month or 2, but it has changed things. My wife went from wanting to get out to asking me to counseling (have yet to go). We could divorce tomorrow or stay married happily for 50 more years. I don't know.

I guess the ONLY piece of advice I can offer with certainty at this point is lovingly detach from her, focus on getting a life for yourself and really becoming a separate person.

I started attending CODA meetings (codependents anonymous) which may be helpful for you too.

My attitude is that I definitely want my M to improve, but if it doesn't I'm getting "in shape" so to speak.

If you're a real coach, I think thinking of yourself in those terms may help. Stop relying on her as a superstar pitcher that is your crutch. Develop your own talent and become your own superstar. Either you 2 will become a great team, or you'll be in a position to move on to greater things in a much more ready mode.

All the best.

KMP