Well guys, I am feeling very stuck in a rut once again. Everytime I start pulling myself out of it, something seems to push me deeper into it. I've been contemplating what MrsNOP said about converstions having to lead to a resolution instead of just airing a complaint, and I think perhaps that is part of the problem. Thing is, I feel like I am beating a dead horse by repeatedly bring this up to Mrs GGB. When I do, she usually says she's trying as hard as she can. Invariably, the result of the conversation is we ML sometime in the next day or so, but then it falls back off. It seems the only time she's 'interested' is if we've had the convo once again, or if she feels I am getting mopey and concludes that it is because I'm not getting laid. Mind you, when it does happen, it is more IC and less ML because she insists on going right to the bits, and if I try to starther up slowly, she seems to want to get up and do something else. I've tried asking for a schedule. She doesn't want to put a schedule to it. I noticed last night that I was very reluctant to put my arms around her and start caressing her. THinking about it, I realized that I am fearing the rejection once again, and when I touch her nakedness, I can't help but to get turned on. When I finally did screw up the courage to just do it, she fell asleep on me. Now, this is after me going up to be with her at around 8:30. She took out her quilt, flipped on the TV and started saying how she needed to finish the quilt. I'd been asking for some alone time with her all weekend (she's got fertile mucus right now, so we've got to abstain from IC), but have been getting put off each time I ask for one reason or another. We seem to be at a point where she won't outright say no, instead she makes it impossible at the moment and puts it off. If I get particularly down, she'll ask me to come up for a little rubbing or a BJ, but it isn't fulfilling because she seems to be just doing what is necessary for me to ejaculate and that's it. There's little or no emotional connection being generated there. It is like she is just trying to fill the "GGB got off, so I'm off the hook" square. I shouldn't complain, as this is still much more than what it was last year. I've tried to bring it up, but she seems to immediately jump to an interpretation that I am impossible to satisfy and she's doing the best she can. I haven't had any chance since we dicussed it here last week to get her motor running...she's either too busy, too tired, has somewhere to go, has the baby to feed (Sat night she put the baby between us again and said she had to nurse him; he promptly fell asleep, but she wouldn't move him), yada yada yada.
So, it seems that I somehow have to change the conversations from an airing of my feelings to something that resembles a plan for resolution. I'm not sure how to do that, and my feeble attempts so far seem to be getting heard as more complaining rather than an attempt to fix things. Any thoughts on how to jumpt start a resolution process?
HP, I too am feeling myself growing resentful over her not ever coming to bed raring to go. As much as I try to fight it, I can't help but get into this pouty space again :-( For me, I guess it is not so much a dying to be pursued as it is a desire to know that my pursuit is appreciated and desired rather than being a constant source of irritation. Right now, all indications (although she denies it to her core) are that it is just one more thing that she has to do.
