I think getting very sexual right now is exactly the wrong thing to do. (Don't you love having many POV's to choose from? ) In fact I was going to suggest that you back off a bit. Not completely.

I'm thinking back to my own sitch 30 years ago. My soon-to-be-ex-husband and I still lived in the same house, but we were in different bedrooms. I'm trying to think what would have been the best tack to take if he wanted to show me he wanted to save our marriage... Anything physical would have been, well, frankly, repulsive to me at the time. (And I also could NEVER go to bed with CeMar-- I don't care what he looks like!) I think if he had just sat and talked with me and listened to me, giving me his undivided attention, it would have melted my heart. If he had made me feel like I really, really mattered to him. Not just saving the marriage because he wanted to avoid the earthquake, but because he was deeply interested in me and cared about me. As it was, we pretty much led separate lives at that point. Maybe our marriage could have/should have been saved-- it's hard to know from this distant perspective.

And yes, I ultimately was a WAW-- I left him for another man (with whom I had NOT been intimate before I left, although my H believed I had been). The OM and I could talk for hours and hours... we wound up living together for three years, then he left me. But we used to set the alarm for 4:00 in the morning so we could get up early, not to make love, but to TALK! Both of us were starved for someone who would really listen and converse! Even after we broke up, one time we had a seven-hour phone conversation. We always had something to say to each other. And no, words of affirmation is NOT my LL (It's gift giving/receiving.)

(My ex remarried within a year of our divorce to a woman I introduced him to from a VERY wealthy family and they will celebrate their 30th anniversary next year. They have one son.

(The OM has been married for 24 years and has three children. His middle child, a 17- year old daughter, is a wild child who has been in and out of drug rehab for years. She just gave birth to a daughter earlier this year-- not married, lives with the bf's parents because she and her parents do not get along at all!

(Somehow, Life goes on.)