Lillie....I agree with you also. If she did want to be gone she would have by now, house or not. I think she is very confused. Not just about the other man really but the hurt she feels and what she really wants in life. I know as a woman it can be so difficult when you want children but don't see iut as a possibility. I bet she feels like her biological clock is ticking.
CSW...I know you have mentioned she don't think you can provide finacial stability to have a family. Has she ever mentioned this to you. I believe if I'm not mistaken that you have been together 10 years? In all that time was this something she kept mentioning that she wanted but you ignored or said it wasn't something you also wanted. I know you are making lots of changes. Which is awesome. But I know you mentioned you feel depressed at the end of the day at your job. Because you are not doing your dream. Byt then you mentioned your dream of doing art had not been able to provide you with enough stability to consider a family. Maybe she is worried about this and something she is also thinking about it and weighing in her mind. If this job is a ploy to show her you have changed but when she comes back you may go back to the same ole ways. Maybe her anger and venom isn't coming because of the other man. Maybe it has nothing to do with him at all or maybe nobody is filling her mind with anything. Maybe she is just at a point where she really wants what she has wanted and waited for you to give her for years. Children and financial stability. Maybe the anger is just her desperation that she feels it may be to late or she let all these years just go and patiently waited.
Just trying to give you something to think about. Not trying to bash you at all. To let you know that her anger may be coming from somewehere else that just has to do with her and not what anyone else planted in her mind.
Maybe a relationship talk is in order. A long talk where you could hash out all that has been troubling your marriage.
