I feel as if I am playing whack-a-mole. I have never played it before, but from how it is described on this board, I think I have a pretty good idea of how it works!
The last few weeks I have been juggling two sets of guests for a total of 14 nights, with some sticky moments. There have been counteless end of year activities to attend at D's school, some of which have clashed with other things we had planned. One of my students has been playing silly buggers with me, cancelling at the last moment. H has been calling unusually often, and this morning he emailed me a (polite, for a change) reminder to address his previous email about his 'concerns' re: paying less and selling the house...
I rang my lawyer to fix an appointment for next Monday. I cannot live with so much uncertainty and pressure for much longer. I want to know what the bottom line is regarding what H needs to pay towards D and her upkeep and housing etc., that does NOT REQUIRE ME to keep accounting to H. In any case he is earning far more than I am at the moment, but he seems to think he should have to pay me just about 250 dollars a month for D, we should sell the house and split the equity, and just go from there. His email is full of concern for his own security and future, but not a word about my and D's security and future!
Have I said this before? I CAN'T WAIT till our assets are divided and our Separation Agreement/Divorce terms are cast iron. At least I will feel I am standing on terra firma.
I have never felt, and could never feel, I am standing on solid ground with my H, and I reognise that fact and am so grateful I am out of any R with him. I have always had less money than him, but I have never felt as financially insecure as with him! I have always cut my cloth to suit my circumstances and will do so in the future. But I need a certain someone to quit yanking on the cloth!
One thing I am learning to do is to disregrad all the fluff and speculation in his emails - how he will "probably" buy a house in the hills as it is so expensive in the city. Going by his track record, he will just as likely take off for a two year trip around the world with the money from the equity, if he gets his hands on it. It was only two years ago, after all, that he was telling me he would NEVER BUY A HOUSE or HAVE A MORTGAGE AGAIN, and he is already talking about both.
I don't even know that this kind of thing is called *lying*, it is just saying whatever is most convenient at the moment, and his mind changes as often as I change my underwear. (That's every day, folks! )
He is truly a HOLLOW MAN, I have come to see. It jives prefectly with his OWN self-assessment that he is a chameleon.
Oh well, got that off my chest!
Livnlearn
"The unexamined life is not worth living" - Socrates
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