i know that there is alot going on, and your emotions are being pulled in a million different directions, so if you can, breath and place some more focus on you.
you know you love him, and you want everything to work out. and even with your complete commitment, dont you still have days where you want to throw in the towel? he is human and will go through days like this too.
he was grumpy, well we all get grumpy sometimes. it doesnt mean the sky is falling. moods come and go.
let's say you had a crystal ball, and you knew 100% that he really did end it with OW and there was no chance of him going back, not only that, you knew he was completely head over heels for just you and completely happy with that, how would your actions and feelings be then?
would you treat him differently? would you act differently?
i am not suggesting that you open your soul, but maybe if you look at it this way you may have a better time acting "as if".
do you deserve as many reassurances as you feel you need, ABSOLUTLY. you deserve them, but is that really the best thing for your sitch now? maybe not. maybe by not asking for the reassurances, you can assure yourself that you are giving him the space he needs. and that is what will help you most right now.
remember, he cant make you happy, just happier. so if you are unhappy right now, anxious, nervous, terrified, then maybe you are putting too much on him and not enough on you. what did you do to find happiness when he was gone?
how can you do more of that, so his actions dont fill your whole life? how can you stop analizing everything he does and pull that focus back on you?
