Quote: I've made deadlines in my mind, but this is one I told him. So it's important to make it stick, to at least have the ball ready to roll. I dont know how much more of this I can take.
I think that, while deadlines are usually a bad idea, your case may be an exception. It may actually take you saying - in a loving but firm way - "H, I deserve to be treated better than this, I don't plan on sharing my H with another woman any longer, I know I can find a man out there who will love me and S better than this" - in order for him to start to focus on what he's losing in you. (Right now he's only focused on losing OW).
Just don't jump the gun - ie, if H is doing everything right but has, say, a brief phone contact or some similar minor slip that might just be part of the letting go process.
Quote: have never been to a tanning booth in my life. do you see results fast???? I'm sure it would be unhealthy, I have really fair skin, but what the heck for a change?????
Tanning booths cause skin cancer, please don't. But there are great fake tanners out there now (Banana Boat makes a good, cheap one) and they work well if you remember to exfoliate first, and rub some moisturizer on your knees, ankles and elbows first so they don't soak up too much. Makes you look thinner too!
