Hmmm, where my W is at the moment... I think she's at an interesting place. She's 34 and is wrestling with her physical reality of getting older - she comments on this to me, seems to be fishing for reassurance/compliments at times. On the other hand, on the inside, I think she's still at a very young place, working to prove her independence and empowered woman status/position. As a prof with a ph.d. and a nice faculty job/salary etc... I don't know how much further a person needs to go to feel 'empowered' but I've noticed this theme in her language. Kind of the dated 70s version of feminism. IMHO she'll need to break past this pc-jargon stuff, and find her individual truth: What balance b/t work,family,self-love will leave her contented.
Some positives: -She's starting to reduce the importance of work - at least with words. I'll see if her actions follow this. - I see her valuing my time with S5 so much more than she did in the past. In the last 3-4 wks, she's asked me to talk with S5 for disciplining or reassuring/supporting reasons, and each time she literally sits down and watches, likes she's taking it all in. There's a look in her eye of respect and attention. - She has said thank you for a few big efforts of mine, including paying off our M debt. - She has started to comment on how MIL is a nut or a mess.I've finally learned to merely validate her feelings here, and to keep my big mouth shut regarding the ILs (thanks, Lost!).
Overall though, I'm not sure, Martha. I think she's in some sort of post-D honeymoon phase. She has a fat equity check that she's spending right now, she's leaving for Hawaii in about 1 wk, and she always is less depressed in the summer. I don't think she'll move much until she moves out of the house in August, and school starts up again in Aug/Sept. Every year, Fall is when her libido would vanish and her depression would surface.
