Well, keep in mind it doesn't do much for my H either, otherwise I wouldn't be in the sit I'm in now. HOWEVER It could also be your H's technique/or lack there of.

Have you just ever played with each other? The fantasy things. Chocolate syrup (a vinal table cloth upside down or a baby bed pad has its place)...Whipped cream? Might give "desert's on me" a new meaning.

Sometimes a person is so into their own climax and what makes them feel good they forget to lighten up and GIVE to the other. This play style may make the event so silly you can both relax and have that eyecontact moment of togetherness that so often leads to something very satisfying

Pity me that the heart is slow to learn What the swift mind beholds at every turn. Edna St. Vincent Millay