Today was pretty good one! H did lots of AOS for me, so I wanted to come up with some way to thank him for doing so much! I made him supper and did a little flirting...was kind of fun, but sometimes, just not sure how he takes it. Anyways, I seduced him..and of course he like that! Then I asked if I could shower with him and he said yes. Been a long time since we showered together.

Afterwards, we sat on couch together and watched TV. He had softball game tonite and it was late, so I asked him if he would be disappointed if I didnt go to his game tonite. His response was "should I be?"...Not sure how to take that, but I just let it go and said, "I knew you would probably understand that I wouldnt want to go because it is too late and I have to get up early." Should I read into his response?? Probably not!

Ok, I did a bad....I read an old email from H, back in Jan, saying how he still had no feelings for me and that he had tried, but still did not love me or want to hug or kiss me and that he thought we should talk about where and what we should do next. Then, I deleted it! Now I cant read it again. I should have never read it in the first place. Now, I am reading into things and wondering about certain things that I was so sure about.

WHACK!! Yes, I need one!! All those insecurities came flooding back again...so I need to stop focusing on them and realize that the things he IS doing, he would not be doing if he really did not feel that things were better, right?

Tomorrow is a new day, I need to focus on the positives!!