Well, in the past couple days I have seen some good stuff!! Could it be because of my reaction or should I say no reaction to the past weekend?
Positives from H: 1. He's been staying in kitchen/LR with me while on computer instead of going into other room. This is BIG positive...for past 2 weeks, he has spent 5 out of 7 days in other room instead of being in same room as me. 2. He has came and sat with me on couch, w/out my prompting. Another biggie..lately I have had to ask him to come and watch TV with me...but last night especially, he just came and sat by me...it was so nice...!!! 3. We have had some good discussions over the past couple days...mostly ones he has started. 4. He let me know that he would rather I just call him when he is at work instead of texting him. Thats good to know, because I thought it was easier for him to get a text when he is busy! 5. He THANKED me for mowing the lawn this weekend! Wow, he's never said that! That felt good!
180's I have done that are working: 1. I have not hugged or kissed H since last Friday, except one *backwards* hug after I was done scratching his back and a kiss on the hand before going to sleep one night. 2. I have not asked H to do come sit with me or to go anywhere with me. 3. I have acted happy, cheery and fun!( as compared to sad and depressed last couple weeks when I was in a slump) 4. I grilled steaks this week...usually H does all the grilling, but I knew he was tired from working all day, so I offered! 5. I validated his feelings and concerns when we were discussing the non-insurance we were looking at. I kept ALL my opinions to myself. 6. I have not asked H for help during the day with the kids...if he offers, ok, but otherwise I have not. 7. I have been leaving him alone during my work day as much as possible..since we are both home during the day, I have to realize my H needs his space..so I have been working on that real hard. Its also helped that he has been real busy lately and been out of the house most days this week. 8. I do not go to bed before H does...usually I am in bed about 9 every night, but have been holding off or just waiting longer...
This week I do feel so good...and not because of things H has been doing or not doing, but because I have made myself feel good and have done things for myself. WOO HOO I am finally back on track!!
