Quote: He asks me what I'm doing a lot, doesn't he!?
Jo, Andy is doing some of the relationship work. The more he does, the better it is for you. It may not be what you want all of the time though. In my situation, sometimes the more I do, the more screw ups I make.
One C we went to said the more one person chases, the more the other person walks away. So let Andy chase you and only let him catch a little of you once in a while. Hard to do, I know.
In psychology terms, there is a theory of "Intermittent and Variable Rewards" Pet training I am not suggesting you try to "train" anyone. Just made a link so you might come up with some ideas of your own. Supposedly people seek pleasure and avoid pain.
One idea I read about is you can "over reward" pets and people. That is why I said let him catch you once in a while. Subjects that get rewarded too often dont appreciate the reward. Subjects that get too few rewards give up.
Some of this also applies to working with mentally retarded / low IQ children, trying to get them to learn new skills. We also modified the steps and used them on the deliquent boys in the grouphome where I worked.
Don't think this is weird stuff. I do work to get paid just like you do. That is not much different than the pet training, just on a larger scale.
OG Lou BTW I relate to the Co-Dependency stuff too. Inter dependency is good untill it becomes co-dependency.
