It isn't so much the lack of sex that bugs me, more the intimacy. A couple of weeks back we were chatting for hours, doing stuff as a family, talking about the future - he told me I love you and that was after a passioned speech about how wonderful I am and now I've just got to act as if we're friends which is really frustrating.
It seems every time we get to a point in our R where there is a cross roads (like me being more involved with the kids) he just gets scared and backs off. Then I have to go back to platonic and re-build again, and I've done this about 4 times now.
I don't know how to break his cycle of fear.
That coupled with the fact that I knew him BEFORE we were romantically involved. We were childhood playmates, so in total I have known him for 18 years which is a lot considering I am only 28 - this means I have spent more of my life with him than without him, and 11 years of that time has been romantically involved.
It's therefore extremely difficult to pretend that most of my life didn't happen.
This time around though I am trying to implement a no sex boundry until he agrees to some type of proper M, otherwise I could see us doing this dance forever. I thought if I did that, he may realise he has lost me physically (which he couldn't cope with long term, he is always raving about how much he loves my sex) - so then he might panic and think I have to commit or I've lost her, type of thing.
It's really difficult to go through this - that's why I need all of you on here.
