How nice to hear from you KAW! I hope you will update us on your own thread sometime? It would be really nice to hear about how things are in some detail.
Livnlearn
"The unexamined life is not worth living" - Socrates
Hie Keep - I did find you again, over at SSM - looks like good discussions there
Quote: This is really learning a lot of new behaviors that don't come naturally to us, so I keep reminding myself that I have to continue to institute the changes daily.
This is exactly the challenge - the constant reminder that we have to change - I'm OK most of the time, just get tired sometimes. I suppose part of this is also cultivating kindness to ourselves for those times when it all just gets too much
I'm sorry to hear things are average with CAW, but hey, its a lot better than it used to be, right?
And yes, I played back his words to him, in an understanding way, and explained the confidence, hence the hands off, and now that he has had time to cool down, he does seem to have made a 180. Wonders will never cease So technically I should be over the moon, except I'm bracing myself for the next time, and a little pouty that there has been no apology for his 'tantrum'. But, I think my cainercast says it all
Turn it upside down. Or inside out. Look at it from a different angle. Find the hidden benefit that it contains. And be in no doubt. There IS an advantage. A big one. It's just that before you can see this, you have to overcome your expectation of what you think you are supposed to be seeing. You haven't got quite what you think you want. This is a problem if you are determined to have your needs met, specifically and precisely. It is not a problem at all if you can manage to be adaptable.
Today has started off well enough, NG was attentive and considerate. However, he has some travel this week, to ow's hometown, which always rattles me
Hi Slowly, I am catching up with your sitch. I would feel rattled too about NG's travel plans. What is in your ocntrol and out of your control? IS there any way to set that up with yourself to get soem peace with it?
Yuck, Slowly, I'd be a wreck. So what are you doing to thought-stop, to stay with trusting NG, to keep your anxiety yours and not project it onto him? Is he being sensitive to you regarding his destination? IOW, is he saying/doing anything that shows you he is aware and sensitive?
Great job on the mirroring and explaining - and great tack to take, that you were just letting him be and not nagging. I'm glad he got it.
Tough sitch. I am going through something similar with my H going to be on business trip next week. But something MarthaH said to me- you can't control H only you.
So giving you advice I am trying to take- act as if, distract yourself and show H that you are placing your trust in him. Good Luck
Hi Anne - Good to have you visit - peace is a worthy pursuit for sure, and I think as time goes by, I am getting closer to it. NG got home yesterday, and he was good about checking in several times during the day and evening. From the background discussions I could here, he seemed to be with his (male) colleagues all the time. But as we often hear here, there are just some things I cannot control.
Nothing exceptional happening at this neck of the woods, NG and I are getting along peacefully. He seems to be much happier than me, I must say. I kep looking for the something extra but frankly it is all begining to feel like the way we were pre-a.
I know, its up to me to change the dynamics. But darn it, when will he do something
Ah well, the weekend is not so far away. Birthday party for a fried who is turning 40 tomorrow, and a visit to the salvation army with 3 boxes of old books.
Slowly
ps. in case you did not notice, Slowly is in a major funk
I like it straight - gets through more effectively 
