Have you been able to figure out why you still chose porn, even when you knew you were hurting your wife by rejecting her?
I can mentally understand why my H did what he did..for the reasons that he had..but I cannot comprehend why he continued to choose to do it, even though he knew it was hurting me. He was, at that point, making a conscious choice to stay away from me. I had an almost impossible time getting past this thought. Even now, it bothers me, but thankfully it only flits across my mind a few times per year.
