Have to say that my H is kinda weird. He had said that he always loved me, and always will. It's just that he loves the OW too, and more. *sigh* It is kinda depressing.

We had another R talk, which was bad!! It showed how much he is still thinking about her, wanting her. How do I avoid these talks? Told him that as long as he still lives in the house and still gives the kids the impression that he is a "good daddy", I am going to tolerate his confusion, pendulum swings and indecision for another 10 months. Thereafter, he really need to decide ONCE and for ALL. I know it is an ultimatum, but I think I have to put a stand after all he has done to sanity. He said that he will not want to prolong this for another 10 months...again wouldn't be fair the HER!! blah blah blah.

If he does decide to leave the family, I will have to make arrangements to tell the kids, to sort out our mortgage, our joint accounts etc. Once he moves out of the house..I will file for "desertion" and claim maintenance for the boys. Then only divorce will happen 2 years later. I will not let him of the pleasure of having a "divorce". It's my call. He has no rights in this. (Have consulted my lawyer in the beginning when this happened. He thought he could file for divorce and be done with us. And start a new life with the b*&ch. But NOOO..... Btw, we adhere towards the British Legal System, so a little different from the States. I can also claim for his future earnings as well. Not only current.)

Anyway, I re-read some parts on DR yesterday. Have to say that I am yoyo-ing on alot of the principles. Really have to be consistent. Really have to stop the R talks. How do I stop it when he keeps bringing it up???