Wow - you ar dealing with some harsh sH%T from your H. I can't believe he's saying this stuff.
It makes me wonder about his motivation? As horrible as the things he says are, it's more important "why" he's saying them. I mean, unless he has some mental disorder, he knows they're cruel.
Is he testing your devotion? Is he trying to 'prove' that the new DBing you is not real? Does he trust you so much that he feels like he can confide anything in you? Is he looking for a reaction?
We can't know the answers. But his actions are what counts (he broke it off with her and hasn't actually entered the monkhood - besides, I think they have pretty strict application policies, still lives with you, for better or for worse he's still communicating his feelings and status to you). I'd say ignore what he says the same way we ignore it when our kids say we're mean mommies for not letting them run in the street.
