Friday night, had another talk with H. I didn't lecture but just highlighted all those "lecturing" points again. (He started it!!! Honest.)
Went to watch Star Wars with the kids on Saturday AM. Was telling my kids "Anakin is sooo stupid. He had so many advices to NOT go to the dark side, and yet he want to be BADDDDD!!! blah blah blah.." After the movie, in the car we had a little tiff, and I decided to go out dinner with some girlfriends. That night, he gave me a call on my mobile and told me that he wanted to talk to me. Went home and he told me that he broke of with the OW. He said that the reasons that he broke off with her was 1) for the boys 2)didn't want everyone at work to label her a homewrecker. (hello??? Where am I over here??) And he is in a lot of pain. As if I am not!! Told me again that he really loved her. And if he had chosen to leave the family, it would not be that hurtful. (Don't you think that he is such an a@@hole???) Said he had a lot of memories with her. (Hello???? You were with the bl@@dy bitch for 7-8 months, and you have a lot of memories??? What is our 18 years? Bl@@dy nightmares???) Said they planned a future together, to move away together! (A@@hole - how the hell are you gonna be a proper father if you are moving to another country??? A@@hole!! And to say that you LOVE the boys!!!) Do I really have to hear all the details? The many many times that he is in great pain because he is sooooo in love with her??? He says he needs time alone!! I had all these sh*tty feelings in me. All those times that he said he went away for work, he actually went with HER!!! I really want to kill him!!! and her!!!! Felt really sh*tty. Slept over it.
This morning....I went out on my own for almost the whole day. And when I came back, he still kept on saying that if he could be with her blah blah blah. And wanting to tell our son that "daddy doesn't love mommy anymore". What the heck? I really got kinda pissed off. I know I shouldn't have but I told him to stop taunting me, and if he wants to leave just bl@@dy go. I can't stand it!! I know NY is gonna give me good bashing on my head. But why aren't I elated with him saying that he has broken off with her???
I don't know what to expect and do over the course of the next weeks...I've read that they would be moody and depressed. Yes, he is depressed and moody. Provided he doesn't continually taunt me with his stupid love for the b@#ch, I will continue to have PMA and GAL.
By the way, I was right about him moving into her place if he were to move out. The b@#ch actually reserved an apartment for him. How the hell was he gonna think with her around??
I don't know anymore....Now he says he wants to move to another country...I am one complete mess!!
