When she got home last night she tried to hug me. I didn't reciprocate and that irritated her and she said,"You are so done with me." She was mean and rude all day and then wants to hug? We talked briefly but intensely and then she cornered our S-10 about who should live in the house with them, mom or dad. We talked earlier in the day that those types of questions are too much for our boys but she did it anyway. I couldn't believe it! She never plays with them and I told her that earlier in the day. She asked him if that was true and S-10 said "Yes". She said,"What do I do then?" He said,"You're on the internet or checking your emails all the time". I didn't say a word and left the room. I can't believe she did that to him. That is just not right but she got what she deserved, the truth. We talked more at bed time. She is very confused and doesn't know why she does what she does. It was a good talk and ended in tears as usual lately. I told her don't stay with me because it is comfortable or safe, only stay because you love me, I won't settle for any less. We'll see where it goes. She is going to a baseball game today with "friends" so nothing really changes. A FF asked me last night,"You really don't care what she does any more do you". I said,"I can't, it would hurt too much and she isn't going to change anyway." My FF then invited me out again for Cinco de Mayo. I already have a functon to attend but I will see how the night goes. Am I emotionally ready? Good question. Am I ready for a fun night out? Absolutely! I will behave even though I really, really don't want to. Ever since I kicked GAL into high gear I get flirted with everywhere by everybody. Young girls, mature women, at the grocery store, at the gas station, etc. It is almost like W have radar when a M is available and vulnerable. Almost a little scary for me
Bottom line is that she is willing to change but unable. She wants to be happy but doesn't think that will be with me. I think that feeling is reciprocal.
