FYI, you truly are doing great. I agree with others on this board though that advise you to stay away from the R talks...she uses these to bait you, don't take the bait. If you have dead-air between the two of you let her sit in the uncomfortablness of it too....don't feel you have to fill that space with conversation just because you feel uncomfortablel...try to remember, if you feel uncomfy....so does she...why? Because she knows what she's doing is wrong! The nicer you are to her and the more you avoid the R talks...the more blatant her behavior becomes...to her, and to outsiders. Do your best to steer clear of those R talks...when you feel the urge to get into one, stop and go do something to busy yourself.
This doesn't mean you aren't saying you love her, or that you can't stay you love her to her...just avoid those talks where she baits you and you end up with discussions like the one you just described
