Deb - I think you handled that conversation with H magnificently. Classy, lovingly detached, calm - a DB masterpiece!
Now - how about asking for some concrete proof that he has broken it off? A letter that you read and see him send? A letter that says in no uncertain terms that he loves his wife and wants to stay with her and wants NO CONTACT from her in the future?
Then - I know money is tight, but plan a weekend away for you and H alone. He is giving something up, you have to give him the romance and the fun to replace it.
