Hi Dawn...you made it back long before I did! If you get done with all your yard work, I have some you are welcome to do! LOL!
This is going to sound like a really stupid question, I know, but does it look/sound to you like I'm no longer on the tight rope????? I guess I ask because I'm no longer sure what to believe, and I'm afraid that if I let my guard down, I will slip back into my "old" self, and down we will go again. Plus, I can't see things objectively from the inside.
I thought a lot last night about your comments about trust being such an issue for me, and it obviously is, huge. I guess one thing that makes it so big is that I chose H in part because I thought he would never be the cheating kind. I had been through being cheated on by a guy I was engaged to, and NEVER wanted to go through that again. So, here I am, twice bitten, four times shy, I guess. And I don't know how to get past it.
I 've had a hard time last night and this morning over that dang ll bean womens clothing catalog. What if he is getting ow a gift from it? you see, her bday is 5/21, and H is going out of town to a workshop on 5/20. coincidence? I hope. Hard for me? oh yeah. big time.
I have no clue how to reassure myself, and it seems like since my surgery, H is kind of "backed off" after his sitting beside me and playing music, etc. I know better than to pursue, but it is still difficult.
I am feeling better this morning than I have in a long time, I think because I slept well last night for the 1st time in I don't know how long. not sure what made the difference, considering I was anxious about H last night already.