You sound like a spiritual man. Read Gary Smalley's "How to Win Your Wife Back Before It's Too Late." It has some very challenging views of how to treat one's W during D or CS proceedings. In sum, be generous and Christlike toward your W, expecting nothing back in return. Give within reason (you can't ruin yourself expecting to win her back), but this generosity will communicate respect to her priceless role as a mother, and may help to soften her heart toward you over time.
