I'm not a man - but reading Mars and Venus in the Bedroom opened my eyes to something I hadn't understood. Women need to feel closer to have sex, Men need to have sex to feel closer. Naturally this is a generalization, but when I asked my H about it (back when we had real talks) he agreed, and he's a very LD guy. I think that sex can be a real bonding experience, especially when it's going as well as it sounds like it is between you.
My advice would be to be unavailable for a lot of his booty calls. Make him chase. Obviously he really enjoys your sex life, and will seek you out. And then really let loose when you decide it's right.
Unfortunately, it is a bit of a chick thing that we feel vulnerable after sex and tend to seek reassurance and look to feel cherished. All very non-DBing. Anyway you can change the way your sessions end (180). Like if you two cuddle together, and your defenses come down then (as mine totally do) then have a short cuddle, then jump up and say "Wow - that made me hungry... I'm gonna go get us something!" And come back to bed with a smorgasbord of rich chocolate, nuts, fruit, bread (whatever you really like to indulge in - maybe one thing that he does, but make it for you) and have a silly naked picnic in bed.
That way you aren't killing the intimacy or joy of your experience by rushing off or asking him to leave so that you don't get confused. But you aren't lingering in that vulnerable state that our orgasms tend to leave us in.
Wow - this is making me really miss ML. My H rarely initiated, and now that he doesn't want me I feel like I might as well get fitted for a chastity belt. I wonder if he's afraid of the feelings that ML tends to awaken in men. Or if he's afraid of starting something and hurting me. Or if he's just truly not horny - like he says. Or if I'm wasting too much time wondering about him.
