Any thoughts? Yes. Have you thought about disconnecting your phone?
You call him just to say hi and end up with your foot in your mouth and volunteering to run over with food. What exactly is the behavior change here that you want to demonstrate over the phone, you see? Give him time and space. You're coming across as anxious. If you don't call him, that would be a significant change in behavior, would it not?
Are you just talking because you're nervous and an awkward silence compels you to fill it by speaking and that's when you say things you regret?
I'm not saying never ever call him. But if you call him twice a week, he'll never have to initiate contact with you 'cause you're doing it for him. Pull back a bit on this. If you run a campaign of two phones calls a week and become a nuisance, he's going to screen the calls. Instead of trying to come up reasons twice a week to call him, think instead in terms of an occasion here or there that warrants contact. Then think about what you're going to say and what you're going to do during that contact, and what you're not going to do or say, and what your goals are. And stay on track.
Instead of relying on phone calls, make those contacts opportunities for the two of you to catch up face to face, like friends do, and have them in a pleasant social setting, may I suggest, lunch dates?
